A few weeks ago at our Find Your Wing Woman event, I asked the women in attendance to write down on a card what their biggest pain point was in building authentic friendships. After they had written down their thoughts, I collected all of the cards and read them as they started their friend speed dating sessions. I was surprised at how many of them wrote down similar struggles. Can you relate to any of these pain points when it comes to making friends?
Making time for friends
Finding like-minded women
Being an introvert
Where you live in the city
Trying to replace the circle of friends from home
Trying to break into already established friend circles
Once the friend speed dating portion was over, I picked three common themes that I noticed from the cards, and the women were broken up into groups to discuss the challenges and to discover possible solutions. What they shared afterwards was very insightful:
Don't let your fear get in the way of a new friendship
Remember, everyone is an outsider at one point
Don't force it
Be okay with letting it go if the friendship doesn't serve you
Be open to the opportunities
Be careful of the story that you are telling yourself (i.e. getting inside your head) - most likely, the other person is just as nervous as you are
In the end, it doesn't matter how you start - it only matters that you do. Whether you are brave enough to DM someone on Instagram to grab a cup of coffee, to show up to the dog walking meetup, or to join our high-vibe sisterhood. Whatever fits your needs and lights up your soul is the most important thing on your journey to building new relationships (and even maintaining old relationships).
Make the time, don't give fear your power, and be open to finding your future soul sister.