Wing Woman of the Week with Kayla Erdos

This week, we chat with the incredibly talented, Kayla Erdos! You may have met Kayla at either of our Galentine's Day events where she did a live hair demo and answered all of your burning questions about hair and styling tips. In our interview, Kayla shares how she realized that she had a passion for hair back in high school and what parts she absolutely loves about working with her clients. Kayla also dives into how she has struggled with being a people pleaser, how she continues to work on herself everyday, and how she knows her self worth. Continue reading to learn more about our fabulous #wingwoman, Kayla!

1. What makes you happy?

I love to travel, especially to places where there is an amazing beach. The beach/ocean is my favorite place to be, it is where I feel the most relaxed and most peaceful. I also love to explore new places and see how other people live. Being around friends and family also makes me very happy. Just sitting around talking, playing games, or watching movies, very simple things that mean so much. My other favorite place to be is in my salon. Being able to do hair and make others happy and feel good about themselves makes me feel so good. I feel so blessed that i have found a career that doesn't feel like a job, but more like I get to go hang out with amazing people all day. I wish that everyone could feel as amazing as I do when they go to work.

2. What advice would you give your younger self?

As a kid, I was bullied a lot in elementary and middle school which made me really afraid to disappoint people or upset them. This ultimately made me the such a push over and people pleaser. I was afraid to say no or go against the grain if I had a different idea on something. I thought if I did, people wouldn't like me, so instead I would just stay quiet and do pretty much anything anyone asked of me even if it put me in a bad spot. I'm still like that to this day, but it's not nearly as bad. I know now that it is okay to say no without giving an explanation and I know my self worth, but old habits die hard. This is part of my personal development that I struggle with but work on every day. So to help overcome these issues, I would tell my younger self to always be confident, proud, and stick up for yourself and your ideas. Don't care as much about what others think of you; it's what you think of yourself that matters.

3. If you could magically solve one problem in the world, what would that be?

I would want to end all of the hatred and judgment that there is in the world. The fact is that every single person on the planet is different in some way or another. May it be you have a different belief system, love interest, skin color, or even taste in books and music. Not everyone is going to agree, and that's okay! I wish that people were able to focus more on the things that make them happy and not worry about what is making others happy. If you spend all your time and energy thinking that what others believe in or choose to do is wrong because it's not the same as you, you will ultimately not be happy, and why would any one not want to be happy?

4. How did you find your purpose?

In a way, I feel like I am still searching for my purpose. There is still so much that I feel I need to do in my life, I just haven't figured that part out yet. I for sure feel that part of my purpose is to be there for other people when they need me. I love being that person that people can turn to for advice or even to just have a shoulder to cry on. I found this through my passion for hair. I started when I was in high school in cosmetology class. I was just naturally good at doing hair and I really enjoyed it. It was one of the only classes I was genuinely happy to be in. Then putting my love for styling with my love for being around people, it just clicked. Being able to have someone sit in my chair at the start of an appointment, not in the best of mood, and having them leave feeling even the least bit better makes me feel so good. I know a big part of that is they feel they look better which leads to feeling better, but I like to think that in some way that me just being there talking or even just listening was a part of that feeling as well. I just love being able to be there in any way that I can.

5. What is your biggest pain point in building relationships?

There are so many different types of relationships out there. Some are meant to last a life time and some are meant to be in your life for only a certain period of time, but they all help to shape the kind of person you are or want to be. Being a hairdresser, I find it really easy to strike up a conversation with someone and can talk about anything and everything. The struggle is finding that one thing that you both can relate to. Without that one key point, I find it very hard to build relationships with people. Once you have it though, it just comes naturally and you eventually find more and more that you can talk about. Also realizing that you aren't meant to necessarily have a really strong relationship with everyone that comes into your life. That one was really hard for me to wrap my head around. It's okay for people not to click with you, and the sooner you realize that, the more time you have to spend on building better relationships with the people you really connect with.

6. What have you learned from past friendships that didn't work out?

I have taken away so many different things from past friendships. One of the biggest things I have learned when a friendship didn't work out is to always be yourself and to have open communication. I have always been bad at expressing how I feel in situations. I would hold things in and let them build up to the point where I would just explode at the person I was having problems with. They would be confused and wonder why I didn't express concern earlier, making them feel like I didn't value their friendship enough to be able to talk to them. I have also found that in the past, I would change who I was to adapt to someone who I wanted to be friends with. I would say I liked the same things as them, go where they liked to go, and do what they liked to do. After a while, this got very hard to keep up with and when I started to show less of an interest, we would slowly start to drift apart. You shouldn't have to change anything about yourself for the likes of someone else. It took me a while to figure this out, but now that I have, I value the real friendships in my life so much more.

7. Who are your SHEroes (AKA female heroes)?

There are lots of bad ass females out there that are very inspiring. I would say that one of the ones that I look up to the most is Bethany Hamilton. At a young age, she lost her arm and what seemed to be the ability to surf, which was her passion in life. Somehow she found the courage to overcome what life threw at her and continue to pursue her dream of professional surfing. I would like to think that if something ever happened to me that prevented me from doing hair, I would be able to find the courage to find a way to still do what I love. Even in every day life, if I feel like something is too hard or like I can't do something, I just think of how many other people there are out there who have had to overcome much worse things in life.

8. What podcasts/books are you listening/reading right now?

Currently, I am not listening to any podcasts, but I would like to start listening to Getting Curious with Jonathan Van Ness. He is one of the fab five in Queer Eye, and he is also a hairdresser. He has had to overcome lots of obstacles in life and also has a passion for hair, so I feel like I would be able to relate to him on some level.

As for books, I just finished reading "Pieces of Her" by Karin Slaughter. It's about a mother and daughter who go through a traumatic experience together, and the mother sends her daughter far away to keep her safe. While she is away, she finds out a whole bunch of things about her mother's past that make her question everything she thought she knew about her mother. It ended up having a great ending and was enjoyable throughout the whole book. I love reading mystery novels, ones that really make you think or have a great twist to them. I find that Karin Slaughter is really good at doing this in her books. The next book of hers that I want to start reading is "The Good Daughter."

9. Where can we find you?

You can find me on Instagram @kaylaehair_ where I post pictures of the hair that I create and a bit about myself as well. You can also mind me at my salon, Erdos Studio Salon located inside Citizen Salon Studios. Suite 328 508 24th St SW Calgary AB

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